Facebook-break-up-hell

Breaking up is never fun - under almost every circumstance there is a bit of pain and heart ache involved.

The next step is to tell all your friends, if it's a real tuff breakup, you have a lot of mutual friends and stuff... not fun. 

When you tell your family, they might look at you with the "What was the matter this time" eyes - and you have to explain over and over and over again... that it was mutual or that he was an total ass etc.

I my case, the first thing my mom said was: "I am never gonna get grandchildren out of you"... (okay not the first thing - but it came in a close second after the hug and the "I love you")

But nowadays there is one further step... breaking up on facebook. Suddenly, the broken heart icon pops up on you're friends' facebook and you have shared you're breakup with approximately 300 people.

When did this become the most natural thing to do? And is it a good development? After all the well-meant messages I received from my friends (and from people I've randomly met at a party and who have facebooked me and never spoken to since) I have learned that I will never display my lovelife on facbook again.

A broken heart icon on a bad time can cause great damage!

Finding inner peace... and all that jazz

Well....

Moving out, getting a job, paying your bills, doing your own laundry... is actually only the first part of becoming an adult.

After figuring all of the previous mentioned things out... after short three years of living by myself, I found that there is more to growing up than just the practical things... now begins the process of detachment. 

My parents have finally accepted that I am NOT moving back home and that I can take care of myself... so they have begun their own life again... Going away with one days notice... not calling so often... 

And today I found myself telling my parents that they cannot just make those decisions without talking to me first - which is totally ridiculous... seeing as I have spent the last three years hearing them complain about the same thing.

So... As I am entering this new stage of independence.. I am frightened and relieved that there is much more to growing up than I first thought.

It means that we won't stop developing as humans... and that there will always be new struggles to life.

And with every battle fought... there is a victory and a lesson awaiting. 

Giv mig Danmark tilbage - Pia!

Jeg er født og opvokset i Danmark og jeg er ligesom de fleste i min generation vokset op med Pia Kjærsgaard. Jeg må indrømme, at jeg har beundret Danmark for at have et politisk system, som tillader udtalelser som hendes - da dette er en frihed, som har været og stadig er, savnet i det land mine forældre er vokset op i - Serbien.

Senere, da jeg valgte at læse kommunikation, havde jeg igen en slags beundring for Pia, da hun har vist at have enorme evner indenfor dette felt.Men på det sidste er min beundring for Pia Kjærsgaard blevet erstattet af en anden følelse, som altid har været i spil i baggrunden: Forulempelse.

Som så mange 2. generations indvandrer ser jeg Danmark som mit hjemland - Dansk som mit modersmål.

Jeg elsker også frikadeller med brun sovs - og en tuborg til.

Jeg stemmer også til diverse valg.

Jeg har også marguerite øreringe.

Jeg savner også Danmark, når jeg er på ferie i længere tid.

Jeg fik også tårer i øjnene, da jeg så ".. og det var Danmark"

Pia har taget disse symboler som gidsler, og vi glemmer at blive sure over det, fordi "Det er typisk DF".

Men de seneste annoncer, af dommere klædt i burkaer krydsede endnu en grænse, som fik mig til at tvivle på det system jeg før beundrede.

Pias syn på og fremstilling af udlændinge er ikke Danmark. Had er ikke Danmark. Pia Kjærsgaard er det mest u-danske der findes i dette land.

Jeg håber at unge som gamle, på tværs af partifarver, oprindelse og religiøs overbevisning vil være med i min facebook gruppe af samme navn som dette indlæg og dermed give følgende besked til Pia Kjærsgaard:

Giv os Danmark tilbage.

Girlfriends

I was on a christmas vacation with one if my oldest friends - Sofia. We were in Jutland - the dark side of Denmark and didn't do anything but enjoying each other's company. We drank loads of coffee and this one evening we shared two bottles of wine and had a long talk. A talk that ended at 5.30 in the morning.

One of the things we discussed was of course friends - girlfriends. She and I have been friends since high school. We have seen each other grow up, get a bachelor's degree, move out from our parents' house and of course we have been there for each other through various heart breakes.

But still - many friends forget the beauty of real friendship. How hard it is to find a connection with someone, which is real and not based on sexual attraction. The older we get, the more difficult it is to find someone, who truely understands you and loves you for who you are.

We as women need to remember our female friends - and not put them aside when some mr.totally- wrong- and- it- is- so-obvious comes a long. I am sitting at my friend's place right now and she is in fact helping me through a very tough break up. And I have just realized that mr. right is non existant cuz that position is taken by my friend, who has never left my side - even when I did blow her off for a man.

This is is fact all the love I need.

"It's a no smoking sign... on your cigarette break"

It has finally happened.... They have banned smoking in all public places in Denmark... I don't know what to think about it... being a smoker myself.... I kind of like the idea of being more healthy and smelling better when you get home from the pub.... BUT it has some weird implications too....

For instance, I read an article yesterday where a concert manager complained about people coming late to concerts - and hurrying away right when the last song has been played...

Yesterday, I went to a Jazz concert and I noticed that the band was taking many breaks so that they could go outside and smoke... It was annoying... but maybe it just takes some getting used to...

Another thing that has happened is the clear division of smokers and non-smokers.... people are a lot more concious of where they go out... and smokers are much more inclined to talk to eachother while they stand outside the restaurant/pub/whatever...

I am sure that I will smoke less when I go out which is a good thing... but somehow a voice deep down inside of me asks "What about your personal freedom?"

Do I really need a government regulation to make me more healthy?

People in love used to piss me off....

If you are single you will recognize the following scenario - if you are not (think hard - you weren't born in a pair)

You are alone... you feel alone even though surrounded by friends... your last single friend, who you thought would never find a partner has fallen in love with some guy from Jamaica who was just passing through your city and decided to stay because he has found the love of his life.

Suddenly everyone is in pairs - the only thing you see on the street are couples kissing, whispering, speaking some kind of lovers-code that is exlusively for PIRs (people in relationships)... and at that moment you don't feel so single and cool... you just feel... ALONE!

I HATED those couples, hoped that they had some serious issues at home or lousy jobs or whatever....I know it must be some character flaw, but I am being honest here (who are you to judge me?)... but now I have a boyfriend.

I have turned down parties to be able to sit alone with my boyfriend and watch "The Office"... I speak the code and I am annoyingly and completely in love... I am the person I used to hate...

For a long time I haven't thought about the single-me, I have repressed the single me... For all I knew I was never single...

But it is healthy to remember... to wake up from the togetherness and remember oneself....

Because we are all born single!

An unexpected turn of events...

...is an understatement for what is happening in my life at the moment.

No it didn't work out in Munich... the X@-?)&¤#¤%& of a bitch had made a mistake and couldn't employ me after all... SO my status now:

-- No appartment
-- No job
-- No plans

But like my ever so wise Danish teacher from elementary school used to say:

Nothing is so bad that it can't be good for something else

So I am taking these unexpected turn of events as opportunities instead of setbacks - I mean how many times do you get to start your life over?

I will now continue on my quest... if you see me... buy me coffee and give me a pat on the back!